Tough little laptop

One of my tasks at work is managing the IT Helpdesk. Sometimes you get a request where your jaw just drops. Below is an extract of an email exchange with one of my users. It certainly brightened up the morning in our office…

From: [username deleted] To: ITHelpdesk
Subject: Problems with laptop USB ports

I seem to be having some problems with the USB ports on my laptop, [stuff deleted for brevity] I have a feeling it might be something to do with the fact that the computer got run over in a car park about six months ago. It was in a padded computer bag so wasnt too badly damaged and it still works ok but possibly it loosened something around the USB ports that has finally come out/broken?

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From: [Me] To: [username deleted]
Subject: RE: Problems with laptop USB ports

Yes, it's possible that the car park incident is related to the problems with the USB ports. Company-issue laptop bags are only rated to protect against impacts from vehicles up to Band F. Can you advise the model of the car that ran over it so we can see if it's worth making an insurance claim against the bag's manufacturers?

You should also return the bag to the Helpdesk for replacement, as they should not be used after being involved in an incident of this kind. Also, can you advise how much of your time is spent in car parks? It may be necessary to upgrade your bag's protection factor if you are likely to be around larger cars, HGVs, aircraft or light artillery.

I will have someone from the Helpdesk come and have a look at your USB ports.

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From: [username deleted] To: [Me]
Subject: RE: Problems with laptop USB ports

I was thinking that it might be worth seeing if HP want to use the computer in an advert to show how tough their laptops are seeing as it got a full squishing by a whacking great Vauxhall Vectra Estate full up with stuff and pretty much survived! To answer the question about whether it looks like its been run over, theres no tyre marks or anything like that. Just one of the hinges for the screen has broken (although at the time it was only slightly cracked, opening and closing over time snapped it off) and there's a slight blemish on the screeen where the screen got pushed into the keyboard. Other than that it looks fine.

I have a replacement laptop bag with full protection up to light artillery shells now but thanks for your concern.

Thanks